Boundaries

Being a disciple of Jesus Christ, at its core, is a relationship.  And for any relationship to work, boundaries must exist.  Ephesians 5 sets some excellent boundaries for a disciple’s relationship with God, and others in the disciple’s life.  It contains one of the verses most taken out of context (verse 22), but taken in context it is part of defining a relationship.

Boundaries to a relationship is like fences to a farm, or walls on a fortress. They do limit the size and shape of a farm or a fort, but they also provide safety and allows those on the inside to grow and be productive.  For me, it starts with establishing my relationship with God, or rather God’s relationship with me.  When that relationship is firmly established, I can see how to relate to others.  When I see God’s relationship with me properly, I can see the sins that are in Ephesians 5:3-4 more clearly.  Removing those sins helps me to grow, so that I can properly have relationships with disciples and non-disciples.  In today’s world, living free from the control of lust, anger, selfishness and a legion of other sins will make you stand out in a righteous way, a way that allows me to be God’s light to others.

Now on to marriage…

Galatians 5:22 is a Bible passage that has been used in ways that appears to be unloving at times.  Taken in context of the verses around it, God has shown me this:

Verses 1-20 shows how I should establish relationships (and boundaries) first with God, and then with others.

Verse 21 states bluntly how I should live in regards to others disciples.

There are three verses to cover the wife’s behavior specifically (22-24), but six verses (25-30) to describe how I as the husband should behave.  When I take the whole passage from verses 1-30 in context, this is what I see:

If I have a proper relationship with God, I will see the sin in my life, and I will see how to relate first to God, then with others.

One of the “others” is my wife.  If I am properly aligned with God, and others, and I can “wash her in the word” because I am first being washed, and I am doing what God calls me to do, which means I am living within the boundaries of a relationship that first began with the boundary Jesus himself established: “Come, follow me,” Jesus said, “and I will send you out to fish for people. (Matthew 4:19)”

Food For Thought:

Do you see the boundaries listed in this chapter as a burden, or a blessing that will allow you to grow?