Betrayal, Agony… and Forgiveness

At first glance Luke 22 seems like total chaos, like everything is falling apart. The death plot against Jesus, Satan entering Judas, Jesus exposing Judas’ betrayal, Peter’s denial and that all the disciples will fall away that night. The disciples have a dispute about which of them is the greatest. And the night is just getting started.

Later, on the Mount of Olives, Jesus prays for another way out besides the cross. Then, he surrenders his will to his Father, “And there appeared to him an angel from heaven, strengthening him. And being in agony he prayed more earnestly; and his sweat became like drops of blood falling to the ground.” (v. 43-44) 

This was more than overwhelming for Jesus. He was in agony. He knows what’s coming. Judas betrays him with a kiss. Judas used such an intimate expression of love and respect to betray Jesus. Judas’ actions were hypocritical in the extreme – his actions said, “I respect and honor you,” at the exact time he was betraying Jesus to be murdered.

Oh, and later that same evening, Peter denies Jesus three times, three times.

I really want to relate to Jesus here. I’ve felt, at times, like everything around me was falling apart, that I have been used, betrayed and let down by those close to me. But that’s where I want to stop being like Jesus. I want to get critical and withdraw from people and from God. 

But that’s not what Jesus does. What Jesus does next blows me away, He forgives Peter and I believe he forgives Judas. I think of the words he uttered while nailed to the cross, “Forgive them, for they know not what they do.” This request to forgive them covers the ones who plotted to kill him, Judas who betrayed him, Peter who denied him, all the disciples who fell away that night and it covers me too. Jesus went whole-heartedly to the cross to sanctify me. That’s how deep his love is. I can hear him say, “Forgive Jarvis, for he knows not what he does.”

If I dare call myself a disciple of Jesus, I must forgive the same way he forgives. I want to forgive others like he forgives me. It’s all or nothing, no half way. The good news is I don’t have to go through agony and wait for an angel from Heaven like Jesus did. I have the Holy Spirit that lives inside me. I need to listen to him and allow him to guide me. I need to rely on him to lead me in surrendering my will to God just like Jesus did and to forgive.